Why Am I Continuing to Be a Remote Work Entrepreneur Despite It Being H.A.R.D.?
Even though entrepreneurship as a remote worker scares me and makes me nervous, I am continuing to do it anyway because:
The success is mine all mine, just as much as any failure or hardship is mine when it happens.
My personal and professional growth has been accelerated by the constant challenges I face – facing my fears breeds growth. That’s very personally satisfying for me.
I am constantly learning and growing, and as a naturally curious person (aka a nerd), this is ideal for me mentally.
My time is mine all mine, sort of, I have a bit more flexibility than I would have as a new person in a new job.
I love being supportive as a coach/mentor to new agents and seeing their transformation and growth as they overcome their own fears and go after their goals. Honestly, this was one of my goals before I ever started this work, so fulfilling the goal of being a coach/mentor has been a win for me.
Why does remote work entrepreneurship make me nervous?
Remote Work Entrepreneurship is H.A.R.D. Everything falls on your own shoulders, both the good and the bad, the success and the failure. You are responsible for
List of Responsibilities for an Entrepreneur:
license, registration, or certification: if you do not remember to register, to renew, to re-certify, or whatever’s required for your business structure or contract, then your business could be in jeopardy
taxes: no one pays your taxes for you but you, and if you don’t pay now, you’ll pay a lot more later
invoicing: to make sure you actually get paid by your clients you have to do the work to submit the invoices to them in a timely manner
assets, equipment, and inventory: you have to make sure everything you need to keep the business up and running is taken care of or purchased in a timely manner to meet business needs
insurance: you have to make sure your business is protected in case of disaster or crime
bills: if you don’t pay them, they won’t get paid, and then your business could suffer and/or be shut down
Are you interested in a more detailed list of my actual bills, taxes, expenses, and other responsibilities as I continue my journey with a micro-small business as an Independent LiveOps agent? If you want to give me quick feedback, use this survey to give me feedback:
Our Creativity is Beautiful Because Our Creator Made Us Like Himself.
What is losing myself?
Losing myself to me means that I am “in the zone”. It means I am in a meditative space where my whole focus is just on that one thing. There’s no multi-tasking when I am in the zone. And it’s kind of a place of selfishness or self-centeredness, also, which, ultimately, can be a blessing to others who benefit from my creative endeavors.
Note: This is not a place of self-harm or of neglecting or abusing others. That’s not the type of losing myself that I’m referring to. This is not about whigging out / or blanking out while attacking others, nor about numbing out or vegging out to the point of self-neglect or the neglect of my responsibilities to others.
Why I Now Embrace Unique Activities
Making time for things I love is so important to me, at this stage of my life, even if it’s not things that others around me also love. It took me until I got to about 40 years old to finally give myself permission to focus in on things that I love without a seal of approval from others around me. Sometimes this is called codependency… being reliant on others to approve your activities. And I realize that I was miserable and anxious before I started doing that, and I have no plans of returning to that place of being on pins and needles worried about what others think of me and my unique interests.
Another Note: Full disclosure, I started making these changes for myself in my late 30’s or early 40’s, but I didn’t really understand why this is important for me until my 50’s, when I began seeing a therapist that specializes in healing from complex post-traumatic stress disorder, along with co-dependency and narcissitic abuse.
My Unique Activities
Obviously, I am a blogger (and author), and have been blogging since before it was called blogging (year 2000)… it used to be called online journaling. I’ve also been making YouTube videos and podcasting since I first started homeschooling my kids when they were little (about 2008), and they’re now all young adults. Nowadays, I have been using these skills in other ways, including sharing a series about healthier ways for dealing with grief.
Losing Myself In My Unique Activities
I am an extroverted introvert, meaning that I am able to speak in public, be on camera, and talk with strangers, but I still LOVE being alone and delving into creative activities. My creative activities lately have included:
Creating a podcast and YouTube channel that is designed to help women leaders who have survived trauma (including caregivers) and are now striving towards their lofty goals despite the setbacks of life
Creating a mentorship program for my co-workers to help them improve their independent LiveOps businesses so they can have better quality work and get paid more
Focus / Meditative Processes or Activities
Ok so things I do that really help me get into and stay in my “creativity bag” or “stay in the zone” include:
Putting my iPhone (and all ios devices) into Personal Focus mode for 1 hour so that no notifications come through at all for that period of time
Attending co-working events with a group of trusted Women leaders who are doing the same, focusing on their own important activity/work
Turning off all inputs, radio, tv, podcasts, youtube, everything, and just sitting in quiet so I can listen to my own heart-spirit because that’s when/where God’s Holy Spirit speaks to me and boosts my creativity the most
What I Mean By Meditation
Meditation has come to mean different things to different people. For me, meditation literally means just that. Sitting and thinking (or not thinking) while breathing and just existing in a quiet space. But, it is also sometimes walking or doing another activity that is “mindless” while I am alone with my own thoughts.
And, with the help of my therapist, now I also sometimes incorporate tapping. It’s an EMDR therapy to help with healing from post-traumatic stress. I use this when I am upset and recovering from recent hard things / traumas, such as when a family member went missing. This has been a very useful and helpful therapy for me, and it’s surprisingly simple, but what’s not simple is remembering to use it when there’s a high-pressure situation going on.
When Do I Have Time For Meditation
My main time for meditation is early in the morning before my youngest gets ready for school. This is my time for prayer, for reading and/or listening to Holy Scripture, and for meditation because I need to give Father God, by His Holy Spirit, time to speak back to me after I have concluded praying and laying my heart out to Him. This is the time when I know that no one and nothing will interrupt me.
To make meditation even more effective, sometimes journaling also helps, including: a) the type of journal that is discarded after brain dumping, and b) journaling the responses that Spirit speaks back to me in answer to my prayers
However, I’ve also started using my lunch times for meditation, which means that I spend less time on my phone scrolling, and more time just sitting in quiet. This lunch time to focus and listen to my own heart also helps on the days when I was more rushed in the morning and didn’t get my early morning time in. And sometimes I do this when work has been more stressful than normal, so that I can center myself before I get back to interacting with others.
Making meditation time a priority has become more prominent in my life because I can see the fruit of it in my life. I am definitely calmer during crisis. I am definitely more resilient after dealing with trauma. So having time for meditiation is my choice, and I choose it more every day.
Segmenting my time, not just daily, but also yearly, quarterly, monthly and weekly, also helps me to have more time for meditation. So, for instance, I took off from social media and from meetings during the first two months of the year to ensure that I had more time to rest, recover, and refill before pouring out my creativity for the benefit of others. I am confident that choosing to set aside these months, along with weekly times (e.g., on Sunday’s) are helping me to hear my own heart more clearly so that I am not as easily distracted by shiny objects or not as easily swayed by other people’s priorities (agendas) for me that do not align with my own priorities.
Conclusion
Viewing my time as the treasure that it is has really helped me to stop letting others waste my time and to make more time for my unique interests. Finding a good place and time to meditate helps open up my creativity more and brings me into a place of being refreshed and refilled. In this way, I am able to be a better leader and to serve others from a full pitcher as I pour out into their cups/pitchers. And it also helps me to remember to keep stopping for my regular refills of my pitcher by those who I trust with pouring into me, including the Holy Spirit and other people who God is using in my life.
Coach Donna Marie shares insights about managing holiday season grief on the Plant Your Seeds of Transformation Podcast
What I Hope They Say
Because I have dedicated a lot of time to writing and speaking on topics like how to manage #holidaygrief, I hope people say I am helpful in a season where others’ grief and trauma are often overlooked or ignored in favor of all the usual happy holiday narratives.
What I Hope For You
If you’re grieving or recovering from a trauma or crisis, I hope that you find those who really love you selflessly, even if those are just babies or pets. I hope that you allow yourself to grieve in whatever way you need to grieve, while not giving up on your own life and goals. I hope that you’ll download my free grief guide over at PlantYourSeeds.show
During the end of 2022 and for the first half of 2023, our family experienced a major crisis that deeply traumatized all of us and then we had other unexpected crises that set us back a bit more, too. So, following through on some of my personal goals in the first half of 2023 fell by the wayside while we recovered. The hardest personal goal for me to fulfill this year was getting back to podcasting, which I originally started back in 2020. So, I started season 4 of the podcast (Plant Your Seeds of Transformation) knowing that: 1) I was truly afraid to share what I had been through over the past many months, and 2) my schedule and availability were much more challenging than ever before due to new responsibilities.
Despite the fear, I found the inspiration and motivation to get me moving forward with creating season 4 of the podcast. And now, guess what?! I just finished episode 10 of season 4! Wow, that’s amazing that I went from not planning to follow through to now having over two months of content. It feels good to be able to celebrate this.
If you’d like to check out that last episode, I discussed the fact that money mistake shame is dangerous. I gave advice on ways you can start to get past it and get unstuck from cycles of the same money mistakes happening over and over.
If you decide to check out my channel, here’s a link to the community tab so you can comment and leave a note and let me know you found the podcast through this blog article.
Lead Like A Queen Coaching and Consulting, LLC 